In today’s society, we get to hear the expressions “having the right mindset”, “being mindful” and “living mindfully” more and more. These words are being used by a lot of different social media influencers, large number of life coaches, by gurus and by people who are all out there to offer their experiences and insights to you all to help you to create the life you are wanting for yourself, to give you tools to change your life around and to make you see what is needed to achieve your long-wanted goals and dreams.
I am not sure about you, but I am the kind of person who needs to understand things first before I can start applying them into my life. I have to get to the bottom of things, I have to see how things works, I have to do research, read a lot of books or studies on the subject, hear it more than once and from different explanatory point of views so that I can make sense of the teaching, the lesson or the insight and make sure that I am applying and embodying them correctly. That is why I would like to use this opportunity to explain what mindset is and show you what a huge impact it is having on your life.
When you have a look at the meaning of the word, mindset refers a person’s way of thinking, a person’s point of view. It is how you look at the World, events, experiences in your life. It is when you label something as good or bad. It is how you look at things. Whatever happenings and events you are experiencing in your life, it is affected by your mindset. Your mindset is your mental attitude that determines your responses and interpretations of any given situation. It impacts what relationship you are having with life, with yourself and with others. It is something that has been created by you, most likely unconsciously, and affected by your surroundings, by the people around you, by the society and culture you grew up in and so on.
Many of us are experiencing in our life the same things, like loss of a loved one, heartbreak, getting into a debate with someone or losing a job, but how you think about that experience, how you interpret it, what story you are creating around it are all the by – product of your mindset. It completely determines how you are living and thinking about your own life, about yourselves, about your relationships and about any important aspects of your life.
We can talk about two types of mindset:
Fixed mindset is when you believe that whatever skills, abilities, beliefs, or anything you are, and you are having – those are it. No amount of hard work, effort and training will make you better. It is a toxic, limiting mindset. You operate from scare city in this case. Toxic behaviours and outcomes are the results.
Growth mindset is when you understand that whatever beliefs you are having about who you are, whatever skills you are having, whatever adjectives you are using to describe yourself and your life – those are not you; they are not identifying you or your future, they do not have to stay like that forever and you know and believe that you can change them around. You look for opportunities, changes and you understand that you can transform yourself at any time in your life and you can get better through dedication, commitment, effort and even through so called “failure”.
But, as always and with everything in life, it all has to start with you. If you do not believe that it is possible to change, you will not. No matter how hard someone starts to explain and prove to you that you can grow and evolve at any time in your life, and just because you grew up within certain circumstances and with certain beliefs that are not defining you nor your future and they do not have to stay like that, if you are not ready, determined, and committed for the growth work that you need to do and for the mindset change that is required to achieve your greatest potentials, no matter how hard you try, or tell yourself the lie that you try, change will never happen in your life. If you do not believe in you, if you are not ready for the change nor wanting it for yourself but for someone else, you will not see the results that will help you keep moving forward. Everything in your life, I believe, has to be done for / by you and not for / by someone else. Otherwise at some point, it will all come downhill.
You have to see and understand that no matter what you are trying to achieve, change, gain or lose in your life, all are starting with the mindset. First, you have to be aware and realise that your current mindset is not beneficial for you in any way and it is not serving any areas of your life. Once you see that, once you start working on transforming your mindset, everything else will fall into place slowly but surely. Trust and believe that. It is always the mindset that has to be changed no matter what area of life you are wanting to improve. The same rabbit hole that people are keep going down is that when they try to transform some or all part of their life, they immediately start changing certain behaviours, habits, or actions of theirs. They think, if I start or stop doing that particular thing, my life and my performance will change. But the thing is that things come into existence in the following way: your mindset, that creates your thoughts and feelings, informs your behaviour and drives your actions and that create results. So, without addressing the mindset and trying to change actions, behaviours as first, no matter how hard or how many times you are trying to do so, you are just keep repeating the same patter and no actual results will be seen and achieved. Mindset is the precursor to your actions and your results will reflect that.
As I am saying and keep repeating myself, mindset is everything, it is the key. It is the most significant thing in your life if you want to find peace, joy, ease, fulfilment, love, compassion and if you want to find your purpose and fulfil it. It is the single most important thing that determines your entire life and everything and everybody in it. Once, you realise that, once you see what mindset you are living with, once you admit to yourself that it needs to be changed and once you are ready and committed to make the necessary transformations in your mindset, you will get to experience an entirely new life with an improved you in it. An improved you who is more understanding, loving, accepting, compassionate and at peace with oneself and with others. Who is a better leader than before, who is having better relationships at the workplace or within the family, who is thriving, free, and in constant flow state.